Monday, 25 February 2013

Has Jason Bryggs Met His Match?



I let myself in, look at the screen - nothing urgent - and tidy the place up a bit. I’ve got this American girl coming round, friend of one of my pals in San Diego. He called me the other night.

This is it, Jace,” he said. “She’s the one. Say so-long to your quiet life. Her name’s Buddy-Jo and she’s got a major in Cordon Bleu. Show her the creaking timbers of the Old World, introduce her to your high-up chums and take care. ‘Bye.”

All I need right now is a California gal who wants to stink out the place with fancy cooking. And probably wants to sit through the night in earnest discussion of the Decline of Empire. Theirs, I mean, not ours. I am still tidying the place up when the screen buzzes and on comes the face of Buddy-Jo. At least, I certainly hope it is.

Er, 23rd. floor. Come on up,” I tell her.

I open the door to an amazing vision. She’s beautiful, willowy, got blue languorous eyes and a ton of blond hair piled on top of her head. And a great tan, with health shining from every pore. As Juanito said, forget the quiet life.

Hi,” she says, slowly.

Come in, come in,” I say. “Nice to meet you. How do you do? Have a drink. What would you like to drink? How was your trip? Please, make yourself at home.”

She arranges herself on one of my couches and says, “Milk, please.”

Milk?”

I don’t want to spoil my taste buds before we go eat.”

Sure. Great. Milk, it is. You don’t mind if I have scotch?”

Go ahead.” I do the necessary and assume she is expecting me to take her out to eat. Which is fine by me.

Great place you have here,” she says. “What’s the decor? British minimalism?”

I look around. It doesn’t look minimal to me. Big video wall, one side of windows, book-stand, couches, work station. I’m very proud of it.

Tell me,” I say. “How did you get past Security?”

I just gave them your name, a big smile and my bag.”

Your bag?”

I don’t have an apartment yet and Wanito said you had two bedrooms, here. Is that O.K.? Only a couple of nights. I’ll be no bother and I’ll cook you a meal you’ll never forget.” I tell her she’ll be very welcome. Which is definitely the truth.

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