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Thursday, 15 October 2015

Does Jeremy Corbyn Scare the Daylights out of Dave and George?

Well, I think he does. and I'll tell you how I know. I can't get any time with either of them to pitch my new idea for a sell-off.  I want to get them to agree that I sell-off the Privy Council. I bet there are many countries in the world who would love a Privy Council.  All that tradition and stuff is just what newly formed nations want.  I bet they'd pay a ton for it and I'd get a nice little bonus.  The problem is that whenever I ask to see Dave - or even George - I get the brush off.  I asked why. "'They're locked in with their spin team and Lynton," I was told by the ravishing Peaches McClean, who's temping at Number Ten.  (Peaches is my new confidante.)

I figure that they're worried about Corbyn's unusual approach to PMQs.  So they've got their heads down trying to come up with a hundred more briefs to the blue-banner press to rubbish the poor guy.  As if that hadn't been done enough already.  They're also scared that the public will finally realise that everything they say - Dave and George that is - is very dodgy. All of which means that I can't get on with my job - selling off Britain.   So I'm gonna update my c.v. and see if there are any interesting assignments around for a man of my calibre and accomplishments.  I can't sit about waiting for Dave and his little pal much longer.  (I'm told Dave calls George, 'Tonto' when he's not around!)